Writing this post is hard for me (I'm crying as I write it) but I feel that it is something I have to do since blogging is therapeutic for me, as I have mentioned before.
On Saturday my world changed forever when my mom told me that they had to put my cat, Ziggy, to sleep.
My favorite picture of him
Anger, sadness and guilt all hit me at the same time. I was angry because I hadn't been there to comfort him and I hadn't seen him since last August, the downfall of living 10 hours away from my parents. Mike and I are going to Maine this August and I was so close to seeing Ziggy again that I was of course angry. I was sad because I am never going to see him again, but the guilt hit me the hardest. I felt guilty because I haven't been able to see him as much as I did when I lived with my parents and I was worried that he didn't know that I loved him.
My mom told me that the last thing she told him was how much I loved him and I truly hope he knows that in someway. He was my cat for 17 years and I can still remember the first time I saw him. He was in a potato basket that had a divider in it and he was so tiny, which is funny because he grew to be a kind of chunky cat.
I had a "pact" with him that he just had to get me through elementary school (I went to a K-8 school), high school, college and grad school and then he was free to do what he wished. I am thankful to say that I graduated with my Masters degree last May, so he fulfilled our pact.
My mom has this poem, or some version of it, in her pet scrapbooks and it is the perfect tribute to Ziggy.
What would I do without you
my precious furry friend;
part mischief but part blessing
and faithful to the end.
You look at me with eyes of love:
you never hold a grudge,
you think I'm far too wonderful
to criticize or judge.
It seems your greatest joy in life
is being close to me.
I never knew how comforting
your warm soft fur would be.
I know you think you're human
but I'm glad it isn't true
the world would be a better place
if folks were more like you.
A few short years are all we have
one day we'll have to part.
But you my pet will always have
a place within my heart.
- Author Unknown
Ziggy, thank you for giving me a little bit more than a few short years and know that I will always love you.